Bhajiya Awards 2015

posters

Now that the numerous award functions are done appreciating and awarding the immense talent in Hindi cinema, it’s our turn to acknowledge the ones who hit and missed their luck this year. Some of them were actually unlucky, some made bad choices, and some deliberately tried their luck on crap which ultimately did not sell. So let’s hereby welcome the Bhajiya Awards 2015 😀

 

  1. Audience toh ch**** hai award

    Dilwaledilwale
  2. Pappu can’t act saala award

    Katti Battikatti batti
  3. Thomas Cook award

    Tamashatamasha
  4. Tum Waapas Kyu Aaye Award

    Prem Ratan Dhan Paayoprem ratan dhan payo
  5. Zero Award

    Herohero
  6. Dance pe Chance award

    ABCD 2abcd
  7. Half cooked award

    Humari Adhuri KahaaniHamari-Adhuri-Kahani

  8. Alia’s first bikini moment award

    Shandaarshaandar

  9. King of Bad Times awardCalendar Girlscalendar girls
  10. Ranbir’s Ek Hi Bhool award

    Royroy

  11. Kaash Kashyap ye na banaata award

    Bombay Velvetbombay velvet

  12. Eleven Minutes Award

    Ek Paheli LeelaEk-paheli-leela

  13. Finding Humor award

    Welcome Backwelcome-back

  14. ‘Con’ Sa Award

    Dolly Ki Dolidolly ki doli

  15. Saif’s Annual Appearance Award

    PhantomPhantom

  16. Invisible at Box Office award

    Mr. Xmr-x
    Despite this being one of the best years of Hindi cinema, the winners stood out fair and square. This is what a few winners had to say after winning the award :

    Shahrukh Khan – Working with Kajol was a fair and lovely moment for me. Anyhow my favourite remains to be the remake of Suraj Hua Madham. In fact I would get so overwhelmed that I would start lip syncing to the original song’s lyrics and then Kajal will prompt me ki rang de mujhe Gerua hai !

    Ranbir Kapoor – I am gonna get drunk tonight ! I mean 3 awards in one year? I think they should take me as the lead actor in the sequel of 3 mistakes of my life. And I thought Roy would go unnoticed if I won’t go for its promotions.

    Suraj Pancholi – Although I felt that audience had accepted me as Zero right from my controversy and the emotional hug moment with Salman Bhai. But the way Bhai pulled off the midnight studio stunt and sang ‘Main Hoon Savior Tera’, I knew that now no one can take this honor away from me.

    Kangana Ranaut – I am the unconquerable queen of Bollywood now and Hrithik will agree with that. Moreover, name one person in Bollywood who has the nerve to say yes to working opposite Imran Khan after ‘Tanu weds Manu Returns’?

    Salman Khan – I did not want to let any girl think that I am actually a Bajrangi Bhaijaan, while the truth is that deep inside my heart and behind my aging face lies a secret that  ‘Main Prem tha, Main Prem hoon aur Main Prem hi rahunga’, yakeen nahi aata toh wait for my next movie ‘Aaya Prem Jhoom ke’.

    Sonam Kapoor – When Abhishek and Suraj Uncle showed me the wardrobe for Dolly ki Doli and Prem Ratan, I knew that this will be my chance to show my audience that I am not just a gorgeous plastic doll but can also catch eyes without looking attractive at all.

    Alia Bhatt – We all know that the only thing Shandaar about Shandaar was my walk on the beach in the bikini for which I worked out so much that I can beat Mary Kom with one hand now.

    Emraan Hashmi – I have kept my promise of being the Serial Kisser in Bollywood whether I am visible or not. Thank you all !

    Shraddha Kapoor – To me, this film industry has started to feel like a summer camp. I mean all I ever wanted to do was singing and dancing and jump around being so chirpy that people around start to wonder why is she grinning all the time ! Acting will find its way to me eventually 😀

    Note : Contents of this post are a work of fiction. Readers are advised not to confuse it as genuine and true. All characters in this post-–even those based on real people–-are entirely fictional.

13 reasons why you must watch Humshakals

  Despite the terrible reviews and endless jokes being cracked on the latest release ‘Humshakals’ , we have our reasons why you must go and watch this crazy movie by the one and only Sajid Khan.
  1. Your love for Kishore Kumar, Jim Carrey and Peter Sellers will grow many fold after watching this movie
    Humshakals movie review Jaipur Beat
  2. You will never suffer from constipation. The dance steps in the song “Caller Tune” provides permanent remedy to it.
    Humshakals movie review Jaipur Beat
  3. You would understand the meaning of the phrase “odd couple” after watching Saif romancing a girl half his age, Tamanna and Ritesh dating a much older looking Bipasha
    Humshakals movie review Jaipur Beat
  4. Your respect in doctor’s profession will increase after watching all round capabilities of Esha Gupta such as dancing, cooking etc
    Humshakals movie review Jaipur Beat
  5. You would know what honest confession is all about after listening to Saif sing “ Hum Bigde hue Nawaab hain”
    Humshakals movie review Jaipur Beat
  6. You will start hating dogs after watching Saif and Ritesh play one
    Humshakals movie review Jaipur Beat
  7. You will be brought closer to God as after watching Ram Kapoor in Bikini you will end up chanting “Hey Ram” and that too loudly
    humshakals-5d
  8. You would be reminded of Main Hun Na again and again as Satish Shah’s role is just an extension to his role of teacher in that movie
  9. You would stop bothering about lyrics and melody in hindi songs after listening to Himesh Reshammiya’s composition
    Humshakals movie review Jaipur Beat
  10. You will start treating Himmatwala as a classic after seeing the climax of this movie.
    Humshakals movie review Jaipur Beat
  11. You will never ever watch a Sajid Khan film after watching this one
    Humshakals movie review Jaipur Beat
  12. You will stop finding girls in Bikini or sarees as Hot after seeing Saif, Ritesh and Ram Kapoor wearing them
    Humshakals movie review Jaipur Beat
  13. After watching this, you can’t wait to watch Ritesh Deshmukh do his debut as probably a real man in the upcoming movie ‘Ek Villain’
    Humshakals movie review Jaipur Beat